Dragon's Lair
A short story
Well, my story didn’t get accepted for “Insert Coin” from Raconteur Press, so instead of leaving this on my hard drive never to be seen again, I thought I would post it here.
Dragon’s Lair
Josh looked at the top of the video game and saw the long line of quarters. Really, it was only two, but the two belonged to the top players. He knew he wouldn’t get to play before he had to head home. He had done the usual and only got the chicken nuggets for lunch so he could have a few quarters for the arcade.
“Hey, Josh,” Greg said as he stepped up next to him.
“Hey, Greg,” Josh said.
“You got a quarter on the machine?” Greg asked.
“Nah, Spider and Tony are already there,” Josh said pointing to the two currently playing the machine.
“That’s a bummer,” Greg said. “Let’s go play Goblins.”
Goblins was Greg’s favorite game. It wasn’t a very popular game in the arcade and was always free.
The point of goblins was to collect as much gold as you could before the dragon woke up and crunched you in all the 8-bit glory that the video game could muster.
“Alright, but only one. I want to save my quarters for tomorrow. Maybe Spider or Tony may not be on it,” Josh said.
“Ok,” Greg said with a frown in his voice..
Seeing Greg and Josh step up to the machine, a small sixth grader stood up from the bench he had been sitting on.
“Can I play with you guys?” The sixth grader asked.
“Yeah, I guess, but don’t wake the dragon or I’ll — I’ll …” Greg couldn’t think of something bad enough. “I’ll pound you.”
“Yes, you can play, Kenny,” Josh said.
“Ok. I won’t wake him! I’m getting really good,” Kenny said.
Greg just eyed him as he fed his quarter in.
Josh and Kenny added their quarters, and then Greg selected the three-player option.
They played, collecting coins, and Kenny actually found a gem to really boost their score. In the end, Greg was the one to wake the dragon.
“Aww man, we were doing so good, we almost made a high score,” Greg said.
“My brother always laughs at me for playing this, but I don’t care, I like this game,” Kenny said.
“Who’s your brother?” Josh asked.
“Stanley, Uhm, I mean Spider,” Kenny said. “He doesn’t like me calling him by his name.”
“Your brother is Spider?” Greg gulped. “I was joking about pounding you.”
“One more game?” Josh asked.
“Really? Yeah!” Kenny said.
“Yes,” Josh said
“Alright!” Greg said.
This time, they collected enough gold and gems before the dragon woke up to be able to put their team name on the high score list.
***
“Come on, Joshie. Get up, you’re going to be late,” Josh woke up to his mother yelling from the kitchen.
He opened his eyes and rubbed them, and then threw his blankets off. He realized he had fallen asleep wearing his clothes.
“Oh man, what is that?” Josh said as he wrinkled his nose. His clothes smelled like rotten eggs.
He jumped up and grabbed some clean clothes and then buried his slept-in ones under the pile on the floor.
***
“Here,” his mom said, handing him an already toasted Pop-Tart. “Your lunch is there on the counter. You will have to take the bus today. I have to get to work early.”
“Thanks, Mom,” Josh said.
“Joshie, before you go, I know it’s been hard since I started this new job. We will do something special this weekend,” she said.
“Ok,” Josh stopped and thought about it for a moment. “Maybe, the aquarium?” Josh asked
“Yeah — I think — we can do that.” She said, looking off. “Now get, or you’ll miss the bus.”
***
“You want to trade some Doritos for half your cookie?” Josh asked as he sat down at the table next to Greg.
“Sure,” Greg handed him one of the cookies and took a Dorito chip.
“How was the math test?” Greg asked. “Did Mr. Hand have any surprises?”
“Nah, it wasn’t too bad, he kept to the study sheet he sent home yesterday,” Josh said.
“Oh shoot, I have to go study,” Greg said as he stuffed the last of his lunch in his mouth. “Are you going to the arcade today?”
“Yeah, I still have a few quarters left,” Josh said.
“Ok, I’ll see you there,” Greg dashed off to the school library to study.
***
“Hey, Kenny,” Josh said when he walked up to the Goblins machine.
Kenny was just watching the demo screen. “Hey, Josh,” Kenny said without looking away from the video game.
“Why are you just watching the demo?” Josh asked Kenny.
“Hey, guys,” Greg said as he walked up to the pair of them. “Well, are we going to play or what?”
“Did your guys’ clothes smell funny last night?” Kenny asked, still just watching the digital dragon breath fire towards the screen.
“Yeah, mine smelled like rotten eggs,” Josh said.
“Mine did too,” Greg said.
“Hey, when did we get to the top of the high scores list?” Kenny asked.
“What? We were last on the list,” Greg said.
“Look,” Kenny said, pointing at the video game that was now showing the list with their team name on top.
“How did that happen?” Josh asked, staring at the screen.
“Is this the game you like to play?” Spider asked as he joined the three.
“Yeah, it’s my favorite Stan,” Kenny said.
“Don’t call me that, my name is Spider,” Spider said and then punched Kenny in the chest.
“Ouch,” Kenny said, rubbing where he had been hit. “Ok, Spider,” Kenny said,
“Ah, I see you have your fourth player. Maybe with his help, you might do better tonight,” a four-foot, slightly green bald man said from behind the foursome. He had tufts of white hair growing out of the tips of his ears and was wearing a vest with the name of the arcade over a breast pocket. “He’s a little scrawny, but I guess he will do. Follow me.”
“I’m not scrawny,” Spider said, flexing his less-than-impressive muscles.
“Well, we’ll see if your muscles are big enough. Hurry up, we have to get you four started,” the man said.
“Uhm, where are you taking us. Did we do something wrong?” Greg asked.
“To go get the gold, obviously,” the little man said.
“No,” Josh said.
“No!?! No!?! We have an agreement,” The little man said, and then pulled out a folded piece of paper from his vest. “Right here it says you three will gather gold, and there on the bottom are your signatures.” He unfolded the paper and then pointed to three signatures at the bottom in red.
“That’s not … “ Greg started to say, and then looked closely. “How!?!”
“You all signed it yesterday. Oh, right, I forgot,” the little man said, and he reached out and touched each of the three.
With the touch, they each got a faraway look in their eyes for a moment, and then said almost as one, “Oh.”
“Hey, don’t touch my little brother, I’ll pound you!” Spider said, puffing up his chest.
“Quiet, I’ll get your signature in a second,” the man said and then touched Spider.
Spider stood still with a blank stare on his face.
After his touch, the three had remembered signing and why their clothes had smelled so bad. The night before, after getting the top spot on the high scores list, the little man came out and congratulated them. He said that the top players got a chance to win real gold; they just had to sign the paper and then go on an obstacle course. As he said that he had shown them a couple of gold coins to entice them.
Greed overtook any common sense, and they immediately signed.
The second the last signature was on the paper, the little man snapped his fingers, and they found themselves standing next to a giant pile of rocks interspersed with gold coins and an occasional gem. At the top of the pile was a sleeping dragon just like the game.
“What!?! How did we get here?” Greg asked.
“I think we are in the game or somewhere the game is based on,” Kenny said.
“How do we get home?” Greg asked.
“We have to get as much treasure as we can until the dragon wakes up,” Josh said.
“That is ridiculous,” Greg said, looking at the pile of rocks and the gently snoring dragon.
“Kenny? Kenny? Where did you go?” Josh stage whispered.
“Over here,” Kenny said from behind a rather large boulder. He stood up, holding a green gem about the size of his head.
“What do we do with the treasure? In the game, we had a magic backpack.” Greg said.
“We all have backpacks,” Kenny said as he put the gem into his pack.
Greg looked at Josh, then felt his back, finding an empty backpack.
“Ok then, I guess we get collecting,” Greg said.
The three started grabbing coins and gems until Kenny grabbed the wrong gem and caused a minor avalanche, which woke the dragon.
The dragon opened an eye and saw the three puny humans. It shifted just a bit and then sent out a jet of flame from the side of its mouth. Just as it touched Kenny, the three found themselves standing back where they had started, in front of the small man.
***
“Now that that is taken care of and you three remember your contract, time to get a signature from the uhm — muscles.” The man said with a little chuckle. “Here, sign this.” He said and handed Spider an ornate pen.
Spider took the pen without really registering anything and signed the contract.
“Uh, what?” Spider said, trying to rub his eyes, almost poking them with the pen. “What is this?” He looked at the pen and then tossed it down like it was on fire. “What is going on?”
“Now that is all taken care of, time for you four to start gathering,” the man said and then snapped his fingers.
The four were at the bottom of the mountain of rubble and treasure.
“What is going on here?” Spider asked a little louder than was appropriate to keep a sleeping dragon, sleeping.
“Shh,” the three said and then pointed up at the dragon.
“Don’t tell me … “ Spider started to say, and then saw the dragon right when it shifted a little. “Ohh. What are we doing here?” Spider said again, quieter this time.
“We have to gather gold,” Josh said, bending down to pick up a gold coin near his foot.
“And gems,” Kenny said.
“Count me in! Gold and gems!” Spider said a little louder again.
“Shh,” Greg said.
“Oh, right, the dragon,” Spider said quietly.
The three started gathering loot until Spider stumbled and slid down a few feet of rubble, waking the dragon.
***
“Not bad for your second time,” the man said as he looked through the backpacks that were in a pile in front of him.
“Hey! That’s mine,” Spider said, reaching for a handful of coins that the man had pulled out of Spider’s backpack.
“No, that’s mine, it’s right there in the contract. You will get a roll of quarters for any full backpacks. There is no payment for partial backpacks.” The man said.
“We get nothing for almost being barbecued?” Spider demanded.
“Well, I’m a generous go — man,” the man said and then flipped them each a quarter. “I expect you four here earlier tomorrow. It’s a half day tomorrow at your schools.”
***
“Hey Joshie,” Josh’s mother said as he walked in the front door to the living room. “Dinner will be done in a little bit.”
“What are we having?” Josh yelled back to her. He stood a moment, shaking his head, trying to remember how he got home from the arcade.
“What were you doing? You smell awful,” his mom said, plugging her nose when he had made his way into the kitchen. “Go change your clothes, and put those in the washer.”
“Yes, Mom,” Josh said, heading out of the kitchen to obey his mother.
***
Dinner was one of Josh’s favorite, Mac and Cheese with hot dogs.
“Eat your vegetables,” she said, seeing that Josh was avoiding the broccoli. “You can cut it up and bury it in the cheese. I called it trees and cheese when I was your age.”
“Mmhm, ok,” Josh said around a mouthful of hot dog.
They ate in silence for a while when his mom finally said, “Was school ok today?”
“Yeah, I had a math test,” Josh said.
“How did that go?” She asked.
“Alright, I think I got a C,” Josh said.
“That’s good,” she said.
Josh was silent for a few more bites.
“Mom,” Josh said, trying to gather his thoughts.
“Yes, Joshie,” she said.
“Uhh, it’s a half day tomorrow, can I go to the arcade again?” he asked.
“Yes, that’s fine.” She said.
Josh finished the last few bites of ‘trees and cheese’ and then asked to be excused.
***
“Hey Josh,” Greg said as he sat down next to him on the bus.
“Hey,” Josh said.
“Are you going to the arcade today?” Greg asked.
“Yeah, my mom already said I could,” Josh said.
“Cool, maybe we can play the dragon game again,” Greg said.
“Yeah, that’s a cool game,” Josh said.
They were again quiet while the bus went about gobbling up the children on its route.
“Hey, Josh, Hey, Greg,” Spider said as he got on the bus. He sat at an empty seat behind them.
“Hey, Spider,” the two said.
Both boys turned so they could watch for the expected punch.
“Are you guys going to the arcade again?” Spider asked.
“Yeah,” Josh answered for them a little hesitantly, expecting some rude comment.
“Cool, maybe we can play that dragon game again,” Spider said and then got up and went to the back.
“That was weird,” Greg said.
Josh agreed.
***
“Hey, Kenny,” Josh said to him as he walked up to the Goblins game.
“Hey, Josh,” Kenny said. He was again staring at the demo screens, just watching a perfect game. “Did you ever notice in the demo the dragon talks to the characters?”
“No, I don’t think I’ve ever watched it,” Josh said.
Josh watched the demo for a bit until Greg arrived, followed a minute later by Spider.
“So are we going to play or what?” Spider asked when he stepped up to them. He was already pulling out a quarter.
“Right on time,” the small man said, almost appearing out of nowhere, next to the game.
“Right on time for what?” Greg asked.
“To gather gold, of course. Come along,” he said, and then waggled his gnarled finger for them to follow.
***
“Don’t touch anything,” Kenny whispered as soon as they found themselves at the bottom of the horde.
“Why not?” Greg said.
“Yeah, why not? I want to get gold,” Spider said, dismissing Kenny and stepping up to the closest mound of gold coins.
“Because I want to talk to the dragon,” Kenny said.
“You want to get roasted,” Spider said and then bent down to grab the coins.
“No, don’t touch them,” Kenny yelled.
“Shut up, Kenny, I’m the oldest, you’re not the boss of me,” Spider said.
“Hear him out before you start grabbing,” Josh said.
“Oh, ok, but make it quick,” Spider said, standing back up and slipping a coin into his pocket.
“I think we can talk to the dragon,” Kenny said.
“You already said that. That’s just ridiculous.” Spider said, looking around to figure out which of the gems he could hide in his pocket.
“Well, the demo screen of the game shows the dragon talking to the characters,” Kenny said.
“Why do we want to talk to that thing?” Greg asked.
“I’m not sure, but,” Kenny started and then was overcome with a coughing fit.
“Are you ok?” Josh asked. Kenny coughed for a bit while the boys watched, not knowing what to do.
“Yeah, I’m better now,” Kenny said when the fit was finished. “I just have to sit for a bit.”
“He’s just faking it; he wanted to get out of school today,” Spider said.
“No, I’m not,” Kenny said and then started coughing again. “I think the trips here are causing me to get sick.”
“You’re just a wimp, look at me, I’m as strong as ever,” Spider said and then puffed up his chest and flexed his arms. He held the pose for a moment and then started coughing. “That’s just because of the awful smell,” Spider said, trying to cover his sudden weakness.
“You know what, I didn’t feel very good this morning, either,” Greg said after thinking about it for a moment.
“Yeah, me too. I sounded like an old man. So you think we should talk to the dragon?” Josh asked.
“That’s stupid. Let’s grab everything we can and stuff it in our pockets and not tell that little man.” Spider said, returning to stuffing coins into his pockets until they were bulging.
Remembering the punch Spider gave Kenny, Josh, and Greg started to collect treasure, putting some in their pockets and some in their backpacks.
Kenny just sat and watched the dragon, trying to figure out how to talk to it.
***
“Empty your pockets,” the little man said when the four popped into the back room from the dragon’s lair.
“What, why? I’m not going to give you my quarters.” Spider said. While the other three shuffled their feet, letting Spider battle the little man.
“Empty your pockets, or I will empty them for you,” the little man said.
“I would like to see you …” Before Spider could finish the statement, the little man snapped his fingers, and Spider found himself floating upside down, being shaken by an invisible giant hand.
Seeing the alternative, the other three quickly started pulling out all the loot they had tried to sneak out.
When they had finished, they were standing in the middle of their own pile of treasure.
“I am a kind gob … I mean, man, so I will give you four the weekend off and expect to see you here Monday right after school,” the man said after Spider was dumped onto the floor.
***
“Are you awake?” Josh’s mom yelled through the bedroom door.
“Uhh yeah, I’m not feeling good today,” Josh said, opening his eyes and feeling sick to his stomach and sore throat.
“Ok, I thought you wanted to go to the aquarium today?” she said, opening the door.
“Oh yeah, it’s Saturday,” Josh said and then started coughing.
Seeing that Josh wasn’t just trying to get out of going to school, she got him some cough medicine and put some VapoRub on his chest.
“Well, I don’t think you are up to anything today. Rest and I will bring you something to eat in a bit,” she said.
“Thank you, Mom,” Josh said and then buried himself deep under his blankets.
The rest of Saturday, Josh spent in bed alternating between sleeping and reading.
Sunday, Josh woke up feeling better and went out to find his mother getting ready for work.
“I have to go to work today, but I made you a lunch, in case you feel well enough to crawl out of your cave,” she said as she was heading out the door.
“Thank you, Mom,” Josh said.
She stopped and went back to him and kissed him on the forehead. “I love you, Joshie. If you need anything, Margaret next door can help you.” She said and then went out the door.
“Aww man, the crazy cat lady,” Josh said to the now closed door.
***
“Josh, are you awake. Your mom asked me to stop by and check on you,” Margaret said from the back door.
“Hi, Mrs Cannon,” Josh said, and then opened the door for her. He had been eating a bowl of cereal at the kitchen table.
“Hmm, I think I smell dragons on you. You haven’t been talking to dragons, have you?” she said with a bit of a laugh.
“Dragons don’t talk to people; they just eat them. Besides, they’re not real,” Josh said.
“No dragons are very real, and they don’t eat people. That’s just goblin’s lies,” Margaret said as she went to the sink and started making a pot of coffee.
“Uhm, I think you’ve been reading too many fantasy books,” Josh said.
“That’s rather rude of you, but no, I rarely read fantasy books; they never get anything about magic right,” Margaret said.
Margaret finished making her coffee and then sat down and told Josh more than he ever wanted to know about magic and magical creatures.
“I think I need to take a nap,” Josh said, faking a yawn to get out of hearing more about the intricacies of casting spells under a blue moon.
“Oh my, I’ve been talking all morning about magic. Well, I think I will let you recuperate,” Margaret said, and then got up and started washing her dishes. “Don’t let me keep you. I’ll just finish my dishes and then show myself out.”
“Thank you, Mrs Cannon,” Josh said and then went back to his room.
***
“Hey, Josh,” Greg said when he walked up to the Goblins machine. It was Monday after school. “Is Kenny here yet?”
“Not yet, but Spider said he was coming in a few minutes,” Josh said.
The two of them just stood watching the demo screen.
“Hey, guys,” Spider said as he walked up.
“Hey, spider,” they both said.
“Where’s Kenny?” Josh asked.
“He’ll be here soon. He had to go to the doctor, he had a bad cough on Friday, but it seemed to be getting better. I think he was just faking it for attention,” Spider said.
The three turned and watched the demo screen for a bit, when they saw the portion where the dragon started talking to the characters.
“Look at that, they didn’t take any gold, and the dragon started talking to them, that is so fake, dragons just eat people,” Greg said.
“The crazy lady next door said that dragons don’t eat people, it’s just lies that goblins tell,” Josh said.
“Well, it doesn’t matter since dragons and goblins are both make-believe,” Kenny said, walking up to the game.
“Hey, Kenny,” Josh and Greg said.
“Did the doctor tell Mom you were faking?” Spider asked.
“The doctor said my asthma is getting worse for some reason,” Kenny said.
“Well, about time you all made it. Let’s get to it,” the little man said, and then snapped his fingers.
***
“Wow, he didn’t even wait to get us out of sight before he sent us here,” Kenny said.
“Wait before you touch anything,” Josh said. “I think Kenny was right last time. You know, this is very weird. I remember everything about all the trips to the dragon’s lair, but when I’m not here, I don’t remember anything about our time here.”
“I know, all that gold, and I didn’t remember any of it,” Spider said.
“Yeah, I can’t believe it either,” Greg said.
“Kenny. What do we do?” Josh asked.
“Nothing,” Kenny said. “In the video game, the dragon starts talking to the characters after a bit.”
“How long?” Josh asked.
“I don’t know, the video game simply says ‘time passed, ’” Kenny said.
“I guess we wait,” Josh said.
All four of them stood for a bit.
Spider was the first to get tired of waiting. “This is ridiculous, you can’t talk to a monster.”
“I think Kenny is right,” Josh said. “The lady next door said she smelled dragon on me. She then went on to tell me how dragons aren’t bad.” Josh said, and then continued telling them about what she had said about dragons.
“Blah, Blah, Blah, can’t you guys just be quiet. I’m trying to sleep,” the voice of the dragon rumbled through the massive chamber, causing minor avalanches of treasure.
The boys all froze and just stared up at the dragon.
One eye was wide open, looking at them.
“What do we do now?” Spider whispered.
“Well, you either talk to me or I can send you back to where you came from,” the dragon said.
“Oh, mighty and fierce worm …” Spider started.
“I am not a worm. That is a very derogatory term.” The dragon said. “I’m trying to be nice to a bunch of goblins invading my lair; the least you could do is not call me names,” the Dragon said.
“Gulp,” Spider swallowed in fear.
“We aren’t goblins,” Kenny said. “We’re just boys.”
“Are you sure? You’re not sneaky goblins in disguise?” the Dragon asked
“No, we’re not,” Kenny said.
“Well, you stink of goblin magic,” the Dragon said after taking a big sniff.
“Uhm, sir.” Kenny started. “How do we address you?”
“Mike will do,” the dragon said.
“Uhm, Mic? Is that some kind of dragon title?” Josh asked.
“No, that’s my name. What are your names?” The dragon asked.
“I’m Kenny,” Kenny said.
“I’m Josh,” Josh said.
“I’m Greg,” Greg said.
“I’m Spider, uhm, I mean Stanley,” Spider said.
“Very nice to meet you all,” The dragon said. “So what are you boys doing here?”
“We are being forced by an evil man …” Josh started.
“Goblin,” the dragon said.
“What? What did you say?” Josh asked.
“OH, SORRY, I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE HARD OF HEARING. I SAID THAT YOU ARE BEING FORCED BY A GOBLIN TO DO SOMETHING,” The dragon yelled.
The boys covered their ears and ducked down, expecting to be attacked any second.
“STOP!” Josh and Greg yelled.
“Don’t Hurt us!” Spider cowered where he had been standing.
Kenny just covered his head and waited for the noise and avalanche to finish.
“We can hear you just fine!” Josh yelled.
“Oh, sorry. By the smell of the magic, you must be enslaved by a goblin,” the dragon said.
“What is a goblin?” Kenny asked.
“They are greedy bald green little creatures that are always trying to steal any treasure they can,” the dragon said.
“The man in the arcade isn’t green,” Josh said.
“Hmm, he’s probably disguising himself,” the dragon said. The dragon took another big sniff. “Are you sure you’re not goblins?”
“I am a boy, but I don’t know for sure about my brother. I think he’s a gremlin,” Spider said.
“Which one is your brother. I can take a small bite and let you know if he’s a gremlin,” the dragon said.
“I’m not a gremlin,” Kenny squeaked.
“Haha, I’m just kidding. I’m a vegetarian,” the dragon said. He let out a huge yawn. “Can we continue this conversation in a few years?”
“Uhm, just a few more questions,” Kenny said.
“Oh, alright,” the dragon said, settling in.
“You said the man is a goblin. How do we stop him from making us steal your gold?” Kenny asked.
“Tell him to stop, and he will,” the dragon curled around like a cat turning its head upside down. “Unless you signed a contract,” he said, jerking his head upright. “You didn’t sign a contract, did you?”
“Yes, we did,” Kenny said, sounding defeated.
“Not on purpose,” Spider said. “He made me.”
“But you did, well then I guess you’re stuck stealing gold until you die,” the dragon said.
Hearing that there was no hope, Kenny started to cry and then started to cough.
Spider saw his brother and went over and held him, trying to comfort him.
“There must be something,” Josh said.
“Well, if you can get the goblin to break the contract, you will be free. Let me think about it for a decade,” the dragon said.
“We don’t have any time. This is killing my brother. Every time we come here, he is getting sicker!” Spider yelled.
“Ok, ok,” the dragon said. “I’m sure that the contract is very vague and does not require him to do anything. You don’t happen to have your copies with you?”
“NO! We do not!” Spider yelled.
“Calm down, calm down,” the dragon said.
“Can’t you just breathe fire and roast him, or just chomp him?” Greg asked.
“No, we are not in your world, and I can’t just flit over there. Maybe you guys can hit him with your swords,” the dragon said.
“We don’t have swords,” Josh said.
“Well, that’s not good,” the dragon said. “Hmm, let me think, how to stop him, how to stop him.”
The dragon hummed to himself for a few moments. “What happens, exactly, when you talk to him after you leave here?”
“We appear before him, and he takes our backpacks and then tells us to be back tomorrow,” Josh said.
“Hmm, and you don’t have any way of not going to him?” The dragon asked.
“No, we don’t remember him, but we have to go back to the arcade,” Josh said.
“Oh, that’s sneaky.” The dragon said. “Ok then, if you can’t stop from going to him, maybe you can stop him from meeting you, if you could drive him out of his lair with, hmm. I’ve got it spread orc poop around his lair that will drive him out. Ok, problem solved, go away now,” The dragon said and then started breathing in a huge breath to shoot fire at them.
“WAIT!” Josh yelled.
“What? The problem is solved,” the dragon said, stopping his breath.
“We don’t have orcs in our world to get orc poop from, and besides, when we leave him, we won’t remember this or you or orc poop,” Josh said, starting to get a little hysterical.
“Ok, let me,” the dragon mumbled a little bit while he looked for something. “Hmm, oh, that will do,” the dragon said, picking up something small on the tip of one of his claws. “Here, take this,” he flicked the claw, sending a shiny object straight at Josh. It flew and bounced off his forehead.
“Ouch,” Josh whined.
“Put that on and then talk to a witch or that Robin Hood guy or maybe even the sheriff’s tax collector,” the dragon said.
Josh looked around and found the shiny thing that had hit him. It was a simple gold ring, big enough to be a bracelet for him. “I have to wear this?” Josh asked after he picked it up.
“Yes, just slip it on your first digit and it will block the goblin magic so you won’t forget,” the dragon said.
Josh put it on and pushed it up to his forearm.
“Well, I guess that will work. Just don’t take it off,” the dragon said. “Now go away,” then he breathed the fire.
***
“Well, what do you useless slaves have for me today?” the goblin asked.
With the ring on his arm, Josh could see what the goblin looked like. It was short and green with tufts of white hair poking out of its huge, pointy ears. When it talked, Josh could see its pointy brown teeth.
Josh swallowed, trying to keep himself from throwing up.
“I stumbled almost as soon as we got there, and the dragon breathed its fire. We didn’t get anything.” Josh said.
“Well, let’s see. Give me your bags,” the goblin said. The other three boys immediately gave him their packs.
Josh saw how quickly they obeyed and realized that if he didn’t act the same as them, the goblin would know he was immune to his magic. He followed suit and handed his backpack to him.
He must not have done it quite the same way as the other three, because the goblin looked at him a little funny.
He stuck his head and almost half his body in each backpack, looking for anything.
“That is very disappointing, boys. I hope this won’t happen tomorrow, or I might need to find some new, more capable servants to bring me my treasure,” The goblin said. Once he had looked at each of the packs, he eyed the boys, trying to decide if they were lying or not. He finally came to a conclusion and said, “Ok, I will see you four here tomorrow, right after school.” He snapped his fingers, and the other three’s demeanor changed; they almost looked like zombies. Josh was quick to emulate them and then followed them out the door with a strange shuffling motion.
***
“Hi, Mom,” Josh said when he walked into his house. His mother was in the kitchen making dinner.
“I have to work tonight.” She said in response. “I’m going to have dinner with you and then head out. Margret will be by later and will stay until I get home from work.”
“Ok,” Josh said as he went back to his room to drop off his school backpack.
“When is Mrs Cannon going to be here?” Josh asked when he came out of his room.
“She said she would be over here at eight to watch her programs,” his mother said. “I’m trusting you to be alone for a few hours. Can you do that?”
“Yeah, Mom,” Josh said.
Josh sat down at the kitchen table and just sat there contemplating what would smell like orc poop.
“Mom?” Josh asked.
“Yes, Joshie,” his mom said.
“What do you think Orc poop smells like?” Josh asked.
“What is an orc. Is that a teenage ninja frog thing?” His mom asked.
“It’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. No, it’s not one of them.” Josh said.
“Frogs, turtles, what’s the difference?” His mom asked.
“Turtles have shells, and they are cool. Frogs are just squishy. Orcs are big, ugly, magical creatures.” Josh said.
Josh and his mother continued to discuss the intricacies of the smell of a non-existent creature’s poop while she prepared dinner.
“Here you go,” his mom said, setting down a plate with green beans, fish sticks, and French fries.
“Ohh fish sticks,” he dug in a trying to see how many fish pieces he could put in his mouth at once.
***
“You need to stop hanging around dragons,” Margret said, walking in the back door a few minutes before eight.
“Are you a witch?” Josh asked, looking up from his homework. He was sitting at the kitchen table with books spread out in front of him.
“Uhmm, wow, no small talk, just right out with the questions,” Margaret said. “Yes, I’m a witch.”
“The dragon said I needed to talk to a witch,” Josh said.
“A dragon said?” Margaret asked.
“Yes, a dragon,” Josh said.
He went on to tell Margaret what had been happening.
“Ok, so let me get this straight, you and your friends are slaves of a goblin, who works at the arcade?” Margaret asked.
“Yeah, and my friend Kenny is getting sicker and sicker every time we are sent to the dragon,” Josh said. He stopped for a moment, trying to hold back tears.
Margaret just waited.
When Josh finally had his bubbling hysteria under control, he told her how the dragon said that he needed to get the goblin out of the arcade with orc poop.
They spent a while discussing what would smell like the orc poop. Margaret finally decided that horse poop would smell the closest.
“You can get some near your school at the FFA barn,” Margaret said.
They spent the rest of the night watching her shows until she finally said that he had school in the morning and sent him off to bed.
***
“Hey, Josh,” Greg said when he walked up to the lunch table.
“Hey,” Josh said after he finished chewing. “The crazy cat lady said that she thought horses would smell like orc poop.”
“Uh, ok,” Greg said, looking at Josh with a weird look.
“Oh, right,” Josh said to himself. “I was talking to her about the uhm, the Hobbit,” Josh said, trying to cover up his mistake.
“I couldn’t read those books; they are way too long. I like comic books like Captain America,” Greg said.
They continued to talk about comics and the best superhero.
“See you at the arcade,” Greg said as he got up to head to his next class.
“Yeah, I’ll be there, I just might be a few minutes late, I have to do one thing on the way,” Josh said.
***
“Hey, Josh,” Greg said.
“Eww, what is that smell?” Spider asked.
They were both watching the game, waiting for Kenny and Josh to show up.
“I stepped into some horse poop when I tried to take a shortcut,” Josh said as he hid his manure-covered backpack behind his back.
“Did you have to go around the whole arcade?” Greg asked, seeing the trail that Josh had left.
“Heh,” Kenny said, stepping up with his nose plugged.
“Time to get to work. Wow, teenagers are filthy,” the goblin said, looking around at the manure that Josh had spread around. “As much as I love the smell of horses, I think I will have to have the janitor clean that up. Alright, get to work.”
***
Kenny started collecting gold as soon as they arrived in the lair. He obviously had no hope left.
“Come on, Kenny, let’s talk to the dragon,” Josh said.
“There’s no point,” Kenny said without standing up from his work.
Greg and Spider, seeing that Kenny had resigned himself to being a slave until he died, started grabbing treasure also.
“Fine, I’ll talk to him,” Josh said. “Dragon! Hey Mike, wake up!” Josh yelled. The dragon didn’t move. Josh yelled “Wake up,” again and picked up a rock, and threw it. The only response was the dragon spitting fire.
***
“Let me see what you useless haulers got me today?” The goblin said as he started to go through the packs. “Hmm, very disappointing. Well, looks like it’s time to find replacements. Be back tomorrow, same time — for the last time.”
“You’re going to let us go?” Greg asked with a little bit of hope.
“No,” the goblin said and then snapped his fingers.
Josh again found himself trying to imitate the zombie walk of his friends.
***
“Good afternoon, Josh,” Margaret said from the kitchen table. “Your mom had to go to work, so I ordered a pizza. If it doesn’t involve eye of newt, I don’t know how to cook it.”
“Hi, Mrs Cannon,” Josh said as he walked into the kitchen.
“Wow, that is a powerful stink. Go change your clothes, and by then the pizza should be here.
***
“I guessed you like pepperoni,” Margaret said as Josh sat down at the table, not smelling like dragon and horse manure.
“Yeah, it’s ok,” Josh said, poking at his pizza.
“The horse poo didn’t work?” Margaret asked.
“No, and now I think the goblin is going to send us away forever,” Josh said in a rush. “What am I going to do? I don’t want my friends to die.”
“Calm down, think about what the dragon told you,” Margaret said.
“He said to spread orc poop around and that would drive the goblin away from his lair, then he said something about an old Disney movie,” Josh said.
“An old Disney movie, what does that mean?” Margaret asked.
“Yeah, one of those old ones, something about a sheriff and a fox. My mom made me watch it ages ago,” Josh said.
“A Disney movie? Would drive a goblin away?” Margaret asked.
“Yeah, he said robber or … oh yeah Robin Hood, or a sheriff, or a tax collector,” Josh said. “Robin Hood isn’t real, and we don’t have tax collectors anymore.” Josh started to tear up in frustration again.
“A tax collector, that’s actually a great idea,” Margaret said. She got up and grabbed a phone book. “Eye, eye,” she mumbled to herself as she flipped through the pages. “Ah, here it is,” She stabbed the page with her finger. “The Internal Revenue Service.”
“What is the infernal review service?” Josh asked.
“IRS, Tax collectors,” Margaret said. She jumped up and grabbed the phone, and brought it back to the table. She hit the speaker button and then dialed.
“Internal Revenue Service, how may I help you?” The voice on the phone said.
“Yeah, I want to report a business engaged in income hiding,” Margaret said.
“Ok, do you have any details I can give to an agent?” the voice asked.
“Yes, the proprietor is receiving gold and jewels and not reporting it …” Margret started to say when Josh interrupted her.
“The goblin is making us steal treasure,” Josh blurted out.
“One moment,” the voice said, and then was replaced by pleasant music.
“Magical creatures division, goblin department, this is Agent Stan,” a new voice said.
“My friends and I are being forced to steal treasure by a goblin,” Josh said all in one breath.
“Can I get an address of the goblin’s cave?” the voice said.
They spent twenty minutes on the phone giving the agent all the pertinent information.
“Ok, we will dispatch a team and should have the creature removed in 24 hours,” Stan said and then hung up.
“Problem taken care of,” Margaret said. “Now you just need to keep your friends away until the goblin is gone.”
Josh looked at her and then started thinking about how he could keep them away.
***
“Hey, Josh,” Greg said, setting down his tray.
“Hephh,” Josh said around a mouthful of French fries. Josh had spent the night trying to figure out what he could do to keep his friends from the arcade. He finally figured that short of tying them up, maybe he could use the bracelet. He was afraid to take it off in case he couldn’t remember anything that had happened.
“Greg, can you put this back on my arm right after I take it off?” Josh said, reaching and pulling the bracelet down from his forearm under his sleeve down onto his wrist.
“Uh, yeah,” Greg said, looking at him like maybe he was a little off.
Josh slowly slid the bracelet until it was just around his fingertips. He took a breath and then pulled it off, dropping it on the table.
“When do I need to put it back on?” Greg asked.
“I … “ Josh started to say, and then realized that he hadn’t forgotten anything. “Wow, I guess.”
Greg had already grabbed the bracelet and was about to put it on Josh when he got a strange look for a moment.
“Uhmm, uh, wow,” Greg said as the goblin’s spell was blocked.
“Ok, now drop it and see if it’s permanent,” Josh said, indicating the bracelet.
“Plink,” the bracelet made a soft ringing sound as it hit, “Where did you get that?” Greg asked.
“Do remember the Dragon and the gold?” Josh asked.
“Dragon, is that a new nickname for the third-year eighth grader?” Greg asked.
“Naw,” Josh said, and then reached over and grabbed the bracelet and quickly touched it to Greg.
His face went blank for a moment. “Wow, that is amazing, that bracelet …” Greg said as he looked at it.
“Don’t take it off,” Josh started to say when the bell rang signaling the end of lunch. “We need to stop Spider and Kenny from going to the arcade.”
“Hey, guys,” Spider said as he walked by him to drop his tray off at the tray belt.
“Hey, Spider,” they both said.
“I’m going to skip out of last period and go see my brother at home before we go to the arcade,” Spider said.
Thinking quick, Josh asked, “Can we go with you?”
“Yeah, meet me at the goal posts,” Spider said.
***
“So what do we do?” Greg asked while he and Josh were waiting for Spider,
“I don’t know, but I think Kenny will know. Let’s go to Spider’s house, and then I can slip that on Kenny’s wrist.” Josh said.
Greg gulped, thinking about not remembering again. “Ok,” he said.
***
“Hey, Kenny,” Spider said as he let the three into his house.
“Hi,” Kenny yelled back from his bedroom.
“I brought visitors,” Spider said as he slowly opened the door to Kenny’s room.
“Hey, Kenny,” Josh and Greg said as they followed Spider in.
“Hi, guys,” Kenny said. “I’ll get dressed, and we can go to the arcade.” He threw back his blankets, climbed out of bed slowly, and started to dig for clothes from the floor.
Greg looked over at Josh and then started to take off the bracelet. Josh grabbed it as it dropped from Greg’s hand. Josh walked over to Kenny and grabbed his arm, and put it on.
“Hey, leave him alone,” Spider said, thinking Josh was hurting him.
Kenny stopped a moment and then stood up with a new look on his face. “He’s not hurting me,” Kenny said.
“We need to keep everyone from the arcade for an hour or two, and you and I are the only ones who remember what’s going on,” Josh said as quickly and quietly as he could.
“Uhm, what do we do then?” Kenny asked.
“I was hoping you would know,” Josh said.
“Ok, give me a second,” Kenny stopped looking and then sat down in the middle of the clutter.
“Kenny!” Spider yelled and ran over to him.
“I’m alright, Stan,” Kenny said. “I just got a little weak.” Kenny sat for a moment, partially expecting a punch.
“Come on, get dressed, let’s get to the arcade,” Spider encouraged.
“I will. I just need a moment,” Kenny said, trying to move slowly.
Josh whispered some of what had been going on to Kenny while Spider and Greg were consumed with their desire to go to the arcade.
Spider stood for a moment and then started to pace. Greg started to shuffle and move from leg to leg, getting antsy.
After only a few minutes, Spider finally started to grab random clothes off the floor and toss them to Kenny, “Come on, get dressed, we need to go.”
“Ok,” Kenny said, catching the clothes. “I can’t stall anymore,” Kenny whispered to Josh next to him.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” Josh announced.
“Down the hallway,” Kenny said.
Josh stalled in the bathroom until Greg started to bang on the door. “Come on, Josh, we need to go to the arcade,” he yelled.
“Alright,” Josh said and then opened the door.
Kenny tried to walk as slow as he could until his brother threatened to pick him up and carry him. He sped up just enough.
“We didn’t delay much,” Kenny whispered, pointing to the old jeweler’s clock outside the arcade. They had reached the arcade within five minutes of when they were usually there.
Spider and Greg were pulling the other two through the door when the goblin appeared before them.
“Time for you four to go,” He snapped his finger, and they found themselves in the dragon’s lair.
Just before they disappeared, Josh heard someone yell, “Stop federal agents.”
“What happened?” Josh asked.
“Who cares we are here, might as well fill our bags,” Spider said.
“Don’t!” Kenny yelled. “Let’s talk to the dragon again.”
“Why not?” Spider said.
“Because the cops are at the arcade,” Josh said.
Josh confirmed what Kenny had said. Greg had his memory back and nodded along.
Josh told them about the horse manure and finally how Margaret had called the IRS.
“That’s quite a story,” Mike the dragon said.
The four boys jumped at the unexpected sound and then turned to him.
The dragon took a big sniff. “Sounds like you boys are free.”
“No more treasure collecting?!” Greg said with relief.
“We won’t get to talk to you again?” Kenny said with disappointment.
“Nope, you won’t have to come here again,” Mike said.
“No more treasure,” Spider said, looking around with greed.
“Well, I guess I’ll let you guys take what you can put in your pockets,” Mike said.
Hearing that, Spider almost dove into the closest pile of gold coins. Josh also started to grab, remembering how much his mother had to work to support them. Greg just shrugged his shoulders and started to pick up gold.
“Not to worry, we will see each other again,” Mike said to Kenny.